You could write off Dante’s Inferno as nothing more than an opportunistic God of War hijacking. But you’d be overlooking its genius. Because in the midst of eight hours of abject concept theft, lol-tastic story sequences, and thumb-numbing scythe mashing, Visceral Games does manage to come up with one original, thought-provoking idea: the Devil has a massive penis.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

For as long as I’ve been playing games, about the highest praise that I could give a title was to say, “I can’t wait to play it all over again.” Some of my all-time favorites, like last year’s Uncharted 2, have excited me enough to replay them three or four times within mere months of their release. Mass Effect 2 manages to be something entirely… different. It marks the first time I’ve ever loved a game in such a way that I am staunchly opposed to playing it again, in deference to the unforgettable adventure Commander Shepard and I created.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

So few games are truly for mature audiences—and I’m not talking about tits, dismemberment, and profanity-laced dialogue, here—that you really have to doff your cap to the rare experience that is. The story and themes in Shattered Memories strike just the right tone for grown-ups: it made me feel anxious, frantic, and desperate, in just the right measure. And the story wraps up in an eyebrow-raising ending that’s not so much “OMGWTFBBQ!” as it is, “Wow—that’s pretty goddamn smart.” So, how’s it play? Kinda shitty, honestly.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

The folks at Q may understand better than any other developer how to squeeze maximum impact out of the minute details of a “small” game. Every sound effect, musical refrain, or graphical flourish is a delicious little treat for the senses—and they retain that impact seemingly indefinitely. The gameplay in Shooter delivers in a similar fashion. Equal parts game and science experiment, the fun with physics in Shooter sticks with you long after you’ve completed the game. I only wish it were slightly tougher and lasted a bit longer.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

While it’s relieving to discover that The Saboteur is a fun and fitting send-off for Pandemic (after the trainwreck of Mercenaries 2), it’s also frustrating—because it could have been something truly memorable. The volume of things to explore, drive, scale, and blow-the-fuck-up (and the beautiful WWII Paris setting) are a joy to experience. However, the nagging meters, zones, gauges and other inorganic artifices never allow you to feel like you’re in the world, or completely buy into the story.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

On paper, Borderlands has everything I could ever want in a game. You say “Diablo-style, loot-grabbing dungeon crawler done as quasi-cel-shaded, co-op FPS,” and I say “SOLD.” Who could have guessed that the loot would be so uninteresting, the environments so relentlessly bland, and the enemies so brain-dead (especially the bosses)? It’s really a shame that while the concept is a solid A, the execution is a total Zzzzzzzzzzzz.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

There are many things I expect from a modern Ratchet game: pinpoint controls, inventive weaponry, visuals worthy of an animated feature, and a zany, Looney-Toons-style sense of humor. A Crack in Time fully delivers on those bullet points, then goes on to surprise with an outer-space-roaming open-world structure, time-manipulating puzzles that could be described as “one-player co-op,” and a story that builds to one of the most exhilarating crescendos of any game this year—including Uncharted 2. This is the adventure I always imagined I’d get to play, way back when I was a kid pushing NES buttons.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

Looking for the arcade football successor to NFL Blitz? You can keep looking. With Madden Arcade, EA has attempted to create chocolate-chip cookies using the ingredients for a turkey dinner. As a result, it never really has the flavor of an arcade game. Instead it looks and plays like what it is: a stripped-down version of Madden 10.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

GTA IV and its expansions have received mountains of hype and praise for advancing the series in terms of story and character, but it’s this little dynamo that has re-energized the series where it counts for me—the gameplay. The DS version released earlier this year was a strong reminder that GTA was once more about the moment-to-moment pleasure of playing and less about exposition, stripper mini-games, and digital phalluses. The PSP version takes what was already one of the best games of the year, and makes it one of the best handheld games ever.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.

How bad is it? Just wretched enough to set back race relations in this country four decades.

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About our scale… the number of words in our review reflects the score of the game. In practical terms, you could assume that games reviewed in 49 words or fewer should be avoided, games reviewed in 50-75 words would make a decent rental, and games reviewed in 76 words or more would make a solid purchase.